You need to come to terms with the reality of abuse. Abuse is not caused by anything other than someone being abusive. Many people walk away from abusive relationships with so much shame about what they might have done to “cause” what happened to them. Abuse is not a reaction to what someone has done — abuse is a tool used to control someone. If you believe you were unhealthy in a relationship, you can explore that in therapy. But your partner could have left you; instead, they chose to hurt you. Realizing that abuse happened because your partner was abusive can relieve so much shame and self-judgment. It takes the burden off survivors. I have worked with many people who had to explore the roots of abuse. It can be so freeing when they see it was never their fault. It helps the healing process a lot.
Psychological abuse can leave deep and lasting scars, affecting all aspects of a person’s life. Healing from such toxic relationships requires resilience, support, and effective strategies. As a part of this series, I had the distinct pleasure of interviewing Monica Amorosi, LMHC.
Monica Amorosi is a nationally certified mental health counselor practicing out of Upstate New York. Monica is incredibly passionate about working with victims and survivors of interpersonal abuse, collaborating with individuals at every stage of the leaving and healing process. Monica creates psychoeducational content to help disseminate this vital information to as many people who are ready to hear it.
Thank you so much for joining us! Before we dive in, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your ‘backstory’?
Absolutely! Throughout my graduate education, I worked with disenfranchised youth and vulnerable families. I felt extreme injustice in this work. So many families had to endure the most horrific qualities of life simply due to lack of resources. For many, this resulted in having to tolerate, or even depend on, harmful partners to get their basic needs met. Pain ran through these families like an inherited curse. It only reaffirmed what I already knew: people cannot function well when they face unmanageable adversity. This is reflective of my own lived experience growing up. This work had a weighty impact on me, and I knew I would be in the niche of family violence for the rest of my life.
For my clinical internship, I led a court-ordered group therapy program for convicted perpetrators of domestic violence. I learned a lot about the mind of a domestic abuser. Some were genuinely remorseful, and others were sociopathic with no regard for the lives they harmed. I was able to challenge them and confront their abuse. However, it showed how many potential abusers walk among us; often only identified when their abusive behaviors turn near fatal. More people are harmed behind closed doors than we can even imagine.
I got a job immediately after graduation, working with families from two of the poorest counties in NYS. Again, I got first-hand exposure to how unmet needs, overwhelm, and nonstop adversity change people’s lives. I observed family violence that seemed culturally normalized, and sexual abuse against children was everywhere. Clients could not improve much without needed social interventions. However, the interventions were too scarce or inaccessible to create impact. This further grew my feelings of injustice.
I made my first shift to adult-only therapy once I received my full clinical license. Many people came into our eating disorder practice with extreme nervous system dysregulation. I prioritized looking for trauma, and I realized that many of our clients had experienced harm at various points in their lives. This observation led me to create an eight-week trauma group designed to improve regulation in people exposed to interpersonal harm. Members who went through this group had a 100% completion rate from our IOP. When clients got the chance to face their trauma head-on, its impact on their healing was powerful.
I realized I wanted to work directly with adult survivors of domestic violence. In private practice, I see clients from all social classes, ranging from the very privileged to those barely getting by. Domestic violence is universal; it does not discriminate. However, the more vulnerable someone is, the less equipped they are to escape chaos. And the more groups of oppression someone belongs to, the less often they are believed or helped by the system.
Currently, I help adults with a range of trauma disorders, with a focus on interpersonal abuse. This population is so profound to work with; so much change can happen when we allow them to be seen, heard, and felt in all their true selves. I keep myself up to date on research and education by maintaining my certification as a Clinical Trauma Provider (CCTP). On the side, I create and provide content through a narcissistic abuse recovery organization. My goal is to make critical clinical information easy to understand. I hope this will help more people escape the grasp of domestic violence.
Can you share with us the most interesting story from your career? Can you tell us what lessons or ‘takeaways’ you learned from that?
Interesting might not be the most accurate word; impactful feels more fitting. I want to be mindful of confidentiality; I don’t want to risk any previous client feeling harmed by me talking about their experiences. So, I’m going to change some identifying details. In private practice, I was working with a woman of color. She came to therapy because she feared she was abusive. Upon exploring her relationship, it was clear that she was being psychologically abused. She was being coerced and manipulated, often escalating to the point where she began showing reactive aggression. She was not the abuser at all.
However, the problem with all this was the degree to which her partner would not let her leave. She tried to leave her relationship many times during our work together. A few times, she almost succeeded. The problem was that her partner was a lawyer, and his brother was a police officer. She felt like she had nowhere to turn to for protection. Her partner weaponized wellness checks against her, summoning police to her doorstep, which terrified her as a young woman of color living alone. Her partner was able to use resources of “safety” to terrorize her and keep her trapped. No amount of reporting his actions or seeking legal protection mattered. Eventually, she wanted to stop coming to therapy. She felt she had no choice but to resign herself to her circumstances. I think about her often, which generates a deep ache in my heart.
This case was impactful because the harsh truth is that many safety nets can be manipulated and used to harm. Many abuse survivors do not trust the police and lack faith in legal ways to get protection. Almost all barriers can be circumvented if someone’s partner is powerful or wealthy enough. This reality can be scary to take in. In all my time doing this work, and with everyone I have worked with, no one has ever won a case seeking justice for abuse. It is despairing and heartbreaking, and I hope to see change moving forward.
Yes, finding protection and justice is hard. Still, I must approach every case as if it is possible, no matter what. The stories with unhappy endings stand out due to their emotional weight. But there are just as many stories in my career of people who have left their abusers. They have rebuilt their lives and found peace and purpose after abuse. As long as I stay hopeful that anyone can find safety, I can at least function as one provider who believes they can do it.
You are a successful leader. Which three-character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?
I am a massive advocate for telling the truth. From my training in DBT, there is a needed radical acceptance. It balances all truths at once. Some are not so positive, and some are very hopeful. When we give clients false hope, we harm them by not preparing for possible outcomes. If we swing too far the other way, only focusing on the bad, we give them no hope. So, when I work with someone, I tell the whole truth. I tell as many versions of the truth as seem relevant and necessary to their situation.
I also really believe in sound education. Not knowing what’s happening can cause shame and confusion. It is not uncommon for us to think of harmful or untrue interpretations of our experiences. Education is critical to helping people understand their bodies, thoughts, and feelings and how hostile environments can change them. Learning opens up the pathway to change so people can find new ways to exist in their worlds and find new endings to their stories.
Finally, I hold myself accountable. Many abuse survivors are surrounded by people who cannot say, “I was wrong, and I am sorry.” So, self-accountability is a part of treatment. The therapy relationship is practice for building relationships outside of the session. So, my clients need to trust me- they need to believe that not all people will gaslight or manipulate them. I must own it if I mess up, give lousy feedback, interpret incorrectly, or say something offensive. I must show them that I will not dismiss their concerns or reactions. People do not need an all-knowing therapist. They need a therapist they can trust even when they make mistakes.
Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you think that might help people?
I have a few things in the lineup that I am excited to finish. In my work with this tremendous narcissistic abuse recovery organization, I just recorded my third multi-part educational series. It explains what trauma bonds are and how to heal. I hope this gets published soon and shared with their fantastic community. Once I return from maternity leave in October, I am sure we will put together more exciting educational series.
I am also slowly writing two books. The first book is the manual for the trauma group I developed in 2020. I plan to complete the curriculum, and one day, I want to train other group therapists to run it. I am proud of this group and its outcomes. I want to spread as much knowledge and training as I can. The second book is more of a trauma-informed self-help book. It’s about why people use unhealthy or maladaptive coping mechanisms when trapped in harmful environments. My hope is for it to reduce shame and stigma. It should bring an understanding of why this normal human reaction occurs when we face stress that we were never supposed to endure.
Ok, thank you for all that. Now, let’s shift to the main focus of our interview. Let’s start with a simple definition so that we are all on the same page. How would you define a Toxic Relationship?
Relationships should be fulfilling, safe, nurturing, and developing for everyone involved. They should offer space for both parties to benefit from each other. They should trust the connection and experience affection, closeness, and vulnerability. A toxic relationship is the antithesis of this. It is a connection rife with chaos, conflict, pain, disruption, and harm. At best, a toxic relationship is unhealthy and unproductive. But at worst, it is devastating and even fatal.
Toxic relationships can take many forms. Sometimes, they come from incompatibility; two people force an unfixable connection. But many times, toxic relationships include abuse. One partner holds more power or control and uses this to enact harm. Sometimes, this harm is unintentional. It is compulsive or rooted in deeper issues with coping and expression. However, a lot of times, it’s used intentionally as a tool to hurt the victim. Toxic relationships can harm someone’s development, causing deep attachment trauma or post-traumatic stress.
What are the common signs of emotional, financial, and/or psychological abuse in various types of relationships (e.g., romantic, familial, professional)? How can individuals recognize and address these forms of abuse effectively?
I appreciate that this piece highlights abuse outside of physical violence. Physical abuse is common and devastating, but psychological abuse is even more common. Abuse of any kind is all about control: one person wants to control another for several reasons. It boosts their ego and makes them feel superior. It makes them feel powerful and safe. It makes life predictable and manageable. Even worse, they may get joy from harming others. Non-physical abuse in toxic relationships is extreme and insidious. Many victims do not realize it is even happening. Knowing the signs of non-physical abuse can save someone’s life. Let’s break down the distinct types of abuse you identified.
Emotional abuse is an attempt to control and hurt someone through feelings. They might use their partner’s feelings, or they might use their own. An emotional abuser will then exploit these uncomfortable emotions, such as shame, guilt, disappointment, anger, and fear. Abusers use them to get people to do what they want. They may try to make someone feel awful to mold their behavior, to punish them, or to destroy their self-esteem. An emotional abuser may also use their own emotions as weapons: they make their partner fear the consequences of inciting certain reactions. The partner may fear making them angry. They may fear overwhelming them. They may fear disappointing them. As a result, the victim becomes hyper-focused on always pleasing them, and the abuser’s needs are unfairly prioritized.
Financial abuse is a big reason people get stuck in harmful relationships. Economic harm takes many forms, such as forcing someone to give up all their money or limiting their access to money. It’s also spending money so someone can’t use their fair share, putting them in precarious situations. It’s using coercion to make the victim depend on them financially. It’s not sharing where they get their money and dictating how their partner can use it. This abuse can prevent someone from building a solid foundation to escape a hostile environment. It can lead to toxic dependence because they lack the means to live on their own, even if they are working and bringing in their own income.
Psychological abuse is the abuse of the mind. This type of abuse distorts the way one perceives oneself, the world, and others. I would argue that every kind of abuse includes some level of mental abuse, but it can also be a standalone tool. Abusers can brainwash victims; they alter how someone thinks to fit the abuser’s agenda. They may manipulate religious and spiritual beliefs. They may lie or gaslight. They may train victims to have self-hating thoughts. They may degrade the victim’s ability to trust their judgment. Psychological abuse is so insidious; it can happen so slowly that people are no longer safe in their minds. It eventually affects how someone feels, acts, or interacts with the world.
These forms of abuse can happen in any environment and any relationship. At work, someone’s boss may force them to work for free, may verbally assault them, or may enact control over them. In families, abuse can happen from infancy into adulthood- the family may sabotage growth or independence. They may also wholly abandon or neglect someone. In romantic relationships, abusers use these behaviors to trap victims. They benefit from having them close; they take advantage of the victim’s labor in the relationship or experience gratification in having a target for abuse. People should exit any abusive or toxic relationship as soon as they can.
How can someone begin the healing process after leaving a toxic relationship? Based on your research or experience, can you please share your “5 Things You Need To Heal After A Toxic Relationship”?
1. There needs to be an “after.” I know it’s easier said than done. However, leaving an abusive relationship is crucial to healing. It would be best if you gave up any fantasy that the abuser will change or stop being harmful. You must see them for who they are, not who you wish they were. People cannot heal in a house on fire, and staying connected to an abuser burns you infinitely. If you cannot entirely separate from the abusive partner, you must at least get as far away as possible. When you are in an actively abusive relationship, it takes so much effort to heal and reduce symptoms of distress. You can only do so much when exposed to active harm. The wounds are created quicker than they can be healed.
2. You need to come to terms with the reality of abuse. Abuse is not caused by anything other than someone being abusive. Many people walk away from abusive relationships with so much shame about what they might have done to “cause” what happened to them. Abuse is not a reaction to what someone has done — abuse is a tool used to control someone. If you believe you were unhealthy in a relationship, you can explore that in therapy. But your partner could have left you; instead, they chose to hurt you. Realizing that abuse happened because your partner was abusive can relieve so much shame and self-judgment. It takes the burden off survivors. I have worked with many people who had to explore the roots of abuse. It can be so freeing when they see it was never their fault. It helps the healing process a lot.
3. As hard as it might be, you must develop a healthier relationship with yourself. Pop psychology says, “You can’t be loved until you love yourself.” But that’s not what I mean. We often can only recognize disrespect once we learn to respect ourselves. This is quite different. You notice red flags more easily when you find value in your humanity. You also set boundaries more efficiently, which protects against future abuse. You can leave it sooner if you see it before it traps you. But this only happens if we care enough about ourselves to know that we do not deserve to be harmed — ever. Respecting yourself does not mean you always love yourself. But it means you are committed to caring for yourself regardless of your daily feelings. Helping clients meet their basic needs, neutralize self-hating thoughts, and increase safe boundaries around themselves is a necessary part of this work.
4. One reason it’s easy to get stuck in abuse is that humans are social. We need connection! For people who have limited access to safe, fulfilling relationships, it becomes much easier to get trapped in a toxic partnership. An essential safeguard is to have multiple safe connections. These include friends, family, community members, and providers. Not everyone has easy access to healthy relationships, but therapy can help you work on this and broaden the connections you feel in your life. I’ve worked with people who never believed they could connect well with others, but then they do. Relationships protect you from relying entirely on a toxic partner to meet your relationship needs.
5. The final piece is the need for nervous system regulation, the most essential piece. We become rewired from constant harm. For those who leave abusive relationships, trauma changes how they function. You may be stuck in a chronic fight-or-flight state. You may have developed mental health conditions. Or, you may have adopted unhealthy coping behaviors. Getting back to the healthiest you is crucial; you can do it safely with trauma therapy. I do this exact work, and I love helping people feel safe and at home in their bodies again.
Following financial abuse, what actionable strategies can individuals employ to rebuild their lives and achieve financial independence? What resources are instrumental in this process?
This aspect of healing and escaping abuse is one of the most sensitive and complex parts. We do not live in a world where it is easy to provide for ourselves financially. In the current state of 2024, we are in an active cost-of-living crisis. But that does not mean people cannot build financial stability. I always recommend working with a provider who can help organize support services, social resources, and economic programs. This helps reduce the burden of surviving financial abuse.
At the core, people must rebuild their ability to meet basic needs. If someone is still living with their abusive partner, this means saving every dollar they get access to. It can eventually serve as an escape fund. This can happen in many ways based on each victim’s circumstances. But the goal is to save as much as possible. Some will need the money to afford housing. For some, they may need to go into a shelter or state-funded housing while they build stability. Some may need to move back home or with friends. But finding a way to afford a new living environment is vital.
Building a life means finding stable employment and maintaining complete control of money. People must ensure they can afford food, their bills, and extra expenses for their phone or car. Financial survival can be very daunting, but programs exist to help lift the weight. There are programs for utilities, rent, food, childcare, and others. Many people can get Medicaid or subsidized insurance. This will ensure they can afford the resources needed to heal. Some people may have to ask friends or family for money. This will help them get back on their feet.
There is also an emotional aspect to consider. Victims often have a distorted relationship with money. They may feel guilt or wrongdoing when spending it however they’d like. Or they may need to learn how to manage money on their own. Therapists and financial support providers can work with victims on all these things.
For those impacted by multiple forms of abuse, what comprehensive strategies and support systems are most effective in facilitating their healing journey?
Most abusive relationships involve many kinds of harm. And people may experience abuse from several people. This compounding impact can be very degrading to one’s wellbeing and can feel like a big hill to climb. Sadly, the more kinds of abuse we endure, the more healing we need. There is no universal approach; this is not one-size-fits-all. But some general things are true about what people need to do to recover from abuse.
As we discussed, people will need safety. After so much stress, their brain and body need somewhere safe to rest. They must believe that they will be safe from unending threats and that life has hope. It can be hard to believe the future will be different, but we must at least be curious about the fact that it could be. Even when we are tired to our bones, this curiosity can keep pushing us forward in our healing journey. Wellbeing comes from having healthy friends and family. It also comes from connecting with trained providers and getting social support. It comes from staying away from a harmful partner.
Survivors will need therapy of some kind. Assuming everyone can access mental health care is very privileged, but abuse recovery is a mental health concern. Getting the right help is vital; their abuse may have caused additional mental health challenges. They may need intensive trauma therapy. They might need treatment for anxiety or mood disorders. They may need it for an eating disorder, a substance abuse problem, or suicidal thoughts. It depends on the specific symptoms that someone developed at the hands of their abuser.
There are distinct treatments to aid individuals in overcoming abusive experiences. Abuse is an injury: an emotional injury, a psychological injury, and a cognitive injury. And these wounds need to heal through practices that have been studied and applied. Most of these methods require a trained professional, but some people can do them alone. They will need to rebuild a relationship with their own emotions. They will need to create healthier, more accurate thoughts. They will need to soothe their anxiety and overwhelm. They will need to learn to nurture themselves. They must also stop self-destructive or self-sabotaging actions. They will need to heal their attachment. They must learn better relationship skills for future connections. They will need to know and trust that they deserve care and kindness. This is true no matter what their abuser tries to tell them.
Many people also really benefit from having a recovery support network. This can look like support groups or group therapy. It can also look like joining an online forum or community. There, survivors can talk to other survivors. It can also look like having a solid legal advocacy team behind them. This can breed a lot of empowerment and serve as a motivating force to keep them moving forward in their healing.
What strategies can survivors use to rebuild their self-esteem and confidence?
Remember, the abuser needs victims to dislike themselves. They wanted them to stop caring for themselves; that made it easier for them to hurt their victims. On the other side of abuse, victims must reject this actively. They must be open to the idea that their abuser was lying to them about who they are and the type of person they are. Think about how much compassion and empathy a survivor showed. They gave the abuser many chances or wanted to see the good in them. Think about how strong survivors were in enduring and surviving what they were put through. Think about how resilient and capable a survivor was in finally escaping. There has always been good in survivors — their abusers just couldn’t let them see it.
Leaving an abusive relationship is empowering. One of the best parts is that survivors get to rediscover themselves. They learn about what they like, what they’re good at, and their strengths. There can be a natural resistance to wanting to see themselves as good, worthy, or whole, but they are. They always were. There are many things someone can do to rebuild this self-confidence. They weren’t born thinking they were terrible, unworthy, broken, or any other word they’ve used to describe themselves. They learned this through repeated exposure to someone harmful. And the good news is, we get to learn something new! But this takes the same amount of repetition and reinforcement. It takes time until it finally feels true.
Sometimes, people need to see themselves through another person’s eyes. “What would my family, friends, children, or colleagues want for me? Can I see that I deserve this?” They’ll need to practice speaking kindly to themselves. Or practice small self-care acts. They will need to practice setting boundaries. They will also need to stand up for themselves. This shows survivors that they will not tolerate being harmed anymore. And they will need to engage in practices and activities that they enjoy! The more someone feels healthy and has positive emotions, the better they’ll think of themselves.
How can friends and family best support someone who is recovering from psychological abuse?
The most important thing friends and family members can do is to believe the survivor. It is to hold them with unconditional regard and not shame or judge them for what they endured. It is to provide care and compassion and to show them they deserve to be loved and seen- especially on the other side of abuse. Friends and family may keep survivors from going back to their partner. They do this by holding them accountable or reminding them of what they endured. They support survivors, helping them return to the world and live fulfilling lives. They can offer financial help or housing support. They might create a community for survivors. They also show the importance of healthy relationships.
But not everyone has healthy relationships. For many people who endured romantic abuse, it happened because abuse was already in their homes or communities as they grew up. Some survivors may need to use therapy to build healthier relationships and to feel less alone. Healing alone is nearly impossible. Making connections is crucial for healing. I always encourage people not to judge themselves, as finding these relationships is hard.
If you are a friend or family member hoping to support someone on the other side of abuse, try to be neutral and supportive. Remind the person they are loved. But don’t overwhelm them with affection. They might not feel safe enough to accept it yet. Listen to their story but wait to ask for details they may not be ready to share. Hold an open mind to how people end up in these situations, and function as a loving barrier to them going back. You don’t always need to understand what happened; you just need to have compassion.
What role does therapy play in recovering from psychological abuse, and how can one find the right therapist? Additionally, what tips do you have for overcoming common barriers to accessing therapy?
Therapy, especially trauma therapy, is a science. It is not just a place for survivors to talk about what happened, though that component is also present. It is a space for people to heal from relationship wounds. There are scientifically supported theories and interventions that were designed to help people recover from this harm. Not every therapy style will work for everyone, but everyone has a style that best meets their needs. Exploring trauma therapists takes time, but doing so can help survivors get the care they need.
Almost all trauma therapy is going to follow a similar trajectory. The first step is safety and stabilization. It’s not just about keeping survivors safe from their abusers; it’s also about keeping them safe from their own symptoms. It is expected to develop harmful coping strategies. Finding a new way to tend to ourselves in healing is a big part of therapy. Even the most insightful people cannot always spot their behavioral or emotional challenges; a therapist can help survivors find these. The next step is remembrance and mourning. It means coming to terms with what happened and what they lost. They must also piece together the story of their trauma. When we fully understand our story, we can find closure even if we never get justice. The last step is reconnection and integration. This means not just moving past the bad that happened. It also means creating and stepping into the good of their future. To survive abuse, we must have a life that feels worth living. A therapist can help survivors navigate, structure, and seek this out. They can help survivors feel safe at last.
Barriers to access are vast and overwhelming. Sound therapy can be expensive; they might live in an area with few options, lack insurance, or have providers who don’t take insurance. They may also lack reliable internet or transportation to attend therapy. I wish there were more solutions to this problem, and I apologize on behalf of the field for being so inaccessible. But there are some solutions. Programs exist for people who receive Medicaid to get medical transportation. Many therapists offer a sliding scale to reduce financial burden. I offer sliding scale spots for those in extreme need at $20 a session.
If someone has insurance, they can ask for direct referrals from their insurance provider. They can also go onto a therapy registry, such as Psychology Today, and search for who accepts their plan. This search tool also helps people find specialties, such as trauma or domestic violence. They can contact local social service offices to see what aid can help them get healthcare. People can also ask about financial assistance programs, which will open even more opportunities for recovery.
But keep seeking care. Sometimes, the first therapist isn’t the best fit. Finding a match is often trial and error. Don’t be afraid to speak up if things don’t feel good or they can’t provide the needed treatment. Many people will try out a few therapists before finding one that sticks. Survivors deserve care, and they deserve to be matched with someone compatible and safe.
Could you name a few organizations or professionals that provide crucial support for individuals seeking to restart their lives after experiencing abuse, particularly when they have dependents relying on them?
Survivors of abuse shouldn’t face it alone. There are a lot of excellent, well-equipped resources to help make this process feel less lonely. I always recommend starting with the National Domestic Violence Hotline. They can provide in-the-moment support, guidance, or advice. You can call 1–800–799–7233 or text “Start” to 88788. On their webpage, they have great resources on staying safe. This includes safety plans for themselves and their children. They have a local provider search on their website, which lets them access more direct resources in their area, including legal help.
Locally, many people can benefit from connecting to their local domestic violence shelter or community agency. They can meet with an advocate, even if they don’t need housing help. The advocate can help them leave their partner and find cheap or free legal services. These services are confidential and rooted in keeping survivors safe. They likely will walk alongside survivors for every step of their journey.
While it is not only women who experience abuse, one excellent website is WomensLaw.org. Here, survivors can access state-specific laws covering divorce, custody, and abuse. They can also get legal support to ensure they are protected and informed. WomensV.org is another excellent resource. It has information about support groups for both male and female survivors and tips for finding the right therapist.
If they do have a divorce, splitting assets, or children to consider, survivors will also want to get a legal advocate quickly. Based on what is available in their area, they may be able to get a pro bono lawyer, or they can get an advocate from their local family court. This will give them guidance on moving through this process safely.
For more educational support, I cannot recommend Unfilteredd enough. I collaborate with them to make academic content and share it with their growing community of survivors. This community has nearly 12,000 people who access their information regularly. They offer support groups, informational newsletters every day, video courses, and worksheets, all for free. They also have a paid program where people can access therapy and more direct support for healing.
You are a person of enormous influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. :-)\
My dream is to see our country prioritize safety and stability. This would be done so that everyone gets their basic needs met. As I discussed, there is an undeniable truth: the greater someone’s unmet needs, the more intense their distress. They face more chaos and become more vulnerable to harmful relationships. Family violence is tied to housing, money, food, and community. We would see fewer people trapped in unhealthy relationships if our society were safer and more fulfilling.
More realistically, I would love to see a movement where it’s easier to talk about abuse and victims are more readily believed. This is done by spreading awareness. It takes being willing to talk about uncomfortable truths. We should hold fidelity to what clinical terms and topics mean (we want to prevent them from becoming watered down by pop culture). However, we should also be willing to use these terms openly. This means giving survivors platforms to tell their stories. It also means increasing education about healthy relationships. And it means making this type of content more accessible for everyone. A paywall too often blocks treatment. It needs to stop so more people can heal.
What is the best way for our readers to continue to follow your work online?
There are several ways for people to access additional information about my work. You can visit my clinical webpage for updates. I share press pieces, blogs, and training videos there, which helps you follow my educational process. You can access it at https://amorosi.squarespace.com/.
You can also follow the narcissistic abuse recovery organization I partner with. Unfilteredd is an organization that helps people build a life free from the effects of narcissistic abuse. If you visit their website, unfilteredd.net, you’ll find many free courses, masterclasses, and webinars. There are also support groups and other resources.
For anyone curious about exploring therapy services located in New York or Texas, my clinical booking page can be found through my group practice, Clarity Therapy NYC, at http://www.claritytherapynyc.com/nyc-therapist/monica-amorosi-lmhc-cctp/.
This was very inspiring. Thank you so much for the time you spent on this. We wish you only continued success.
Thank you so much for giving me a platform to discuss something important. As we face more oppression and overwhelm as a collective, the risk of harm rises. No one deserves to feel trapped in a harmful relationship. I encourage anyone ready to leave to start the process and seek help. Successfully leaving an abuser often feels impossible, but it is not. I hope everyone finds the safety and stability they deserve for a fulfilling life.
About the Interviewer: Wanda Malhotra is a wellness entrepreneur, lifestyle journalist, and the CEO of Crunchy Mama Box, a mission-driven platform promoting conscious living. CMB empowers individuals with educational resources and vetted products to help them make informed choices. Passionate about social causes like environmental preservation and animal welfare, Wanda writes about clean beauty, wellness, nutrition, social impact and sustainability, simplifying wellness with curated resources. Join Wanda and the Crunchy Mama Box community in embracing a healthier, more sustainable lifestyle at CrunchyMamaBox.com .
